It was on a date I first asked this question: what is the value of a great relationship?
By the way, I don’t think that guy is ever going to return. I ended asking the most controversial questions and spilling all my potential dating problems. LOL. These are some of the functions of these dates anyway…
If you remember in one of my posts I said I was going to talk about the love that changed everything. I think the window for this discussion is finally opening up today but I am not sure I can spill all the tea though.
Have you ever felt so in tune with a person that sometimes it feels like they are an extension of you? All the things you admire about yourself and the traits of sagacity you envision, your weaknesses and strengths just seem to pair so well. They are the happy and sad parts of you because they make you happier in certain ways but you are also not afraid to be unhappy around them.
The kind of relationship where you are in equal parts yourself. Just existing seamlessly. Where fights and misunderstandings bring you closer, where the happy times are really off the chart, where you figure out the difference between thinking that a person loves you and knowing for sure that they do.
The kind that you feel no need to hide from because you can be completely yourself and being with them makes you appreciate being yourself even better. Where every part of your smile is in some form connected to them but not always directly, just that the thought of them in your life puts you in a default happy state. The kind of relationship were you know that they are your person in the way that you could be miles apart, never speak for even a century but you know somewhere in your mind that even if the whole world falls, they will come over just to find you and ask if you are alright. You may not be the first on their mind but the very idea of their mind emanates from the thoughts of you.
So back to the question, what is the value of a great relationship? The simple answer is it is as valuable as you believe it to be. The philosophical yet practical answer is also very simple, it is everything.
I think for me, the most beneficial aspects of engaging in great relationships is the security they bring. Not just the security that you have companionship for every phase of your life but the security in never having to be brave alone. The deep sense of security you feel is more closely suited to the idea of an anchor, a safe place as opposed to a safety net, an home coming feel. The inexhaustible threshold of longing… There are the kinds of people that you can´t be brave in front of. Even when you hold it together for others, they are the type that when you see their face you just break down and let it all out.
More than these, it is how much of their presence affects all the good parts of you and amplifies it. You think you are brave and outspoken, confident? Try being in an environment that validate that part of you every single waking moment and watch how you bloom and grow. When you bask in the affirmation of all things you admire about yourself. How these people make you feel invincible. It is more than moral support, it is comparable to having a reservoir of strength to draw from.
In fairytale soulmates happens once in a life time, but in reality I think souls are waiting for connection. You find your soulmate as many times as you open yourself to connect. It may be with a tribe of people or with one person in various ways but if there’s anything you must aspire to, it is to connect deeply. As Esther Perel says, the quality of your life is affected by the quality of your relationship.
As 2024 draws to a close, I wish you the fortune of soul mates on your journey ahead.
Hugs and kisses 😘🤗,
Dcconnoisseur.
Connoisseur of Memories 