I heard this line from a movie and it inspired this post..
At this phase of my life, I am particular about achievements and milestones, when specific events happen for me? For instance, when will I find the one or will the one ever find me?😂
When will I make my first XYZ? Will I get to live my dreams as I have imagined? What do I want out of life? Will I ever be content being mediocre?
Am I lazy, disinterested or just lack ambition? Am I really doing this for me or trying to please everyone around? Is this environment toxic for me? Is this person toxic? Am I toxic? Am I growing in the direction I seek?
Am I practising gratitude as often as is necessary?
why do I have pay this bill again? Can I afford this hangout? Should I buy this or that? You see what I mean?
I miss thoughts like how do I open my Christmas present before Christmas? How do I combine my Christmas dress with the shoe, hat, and purse to match?
How to play with my friends outside before mommy comes back. Playing daddy and mommy without even considering the responsibilities attached😂😂, the cruise of innocence…
When will I finish all these assignments? How to avoid my lesson teacher, how to convince daddy to take me to the beach and Mr. Biggs on Sunday after church…
How to seat near my Crush, when to make my hair before assembly, how to avoid seniors and miss Saturday morning jog in boarding house… How to watch movies past bed time..
Now, the questions are more complicated with even fewer answers….What is happiness and does that include contentment?
I like the Nigerian phrase “wahala no dey finish make Una try to dey enjoy” simply means, problem never ends so find ways to enjoy life.
The ironic part about being an adult is the worry that plagues you even when you are happy. Finding means to complain even after you’ve just had your biggest win. I remember thinking to myself once, “If I can just get admission for my master’s, that’d make me the happiest person ever!” Well, that happened and it lasted about five minutes before I remembered to panic about raising the tuition 😂
Even now, I have crossed several milestones after that wish for happiness and I have not come to that place where I am out of complaints and with nothing to worry about.
If you are not beating yourself up about work or professional development, it is about something relating to your personal life or finances.
Sometimes, when we have it good in some areas we keep wishing everything else can balance out so we can “have a better life”.
The incredulous part is we know that we will eventually pass through the phase we are worrying about, that there’d be new trouble to cross but this has zero bearing on how we react in the now. I think a part of us rationalises that worrying is a sign that we are concerned about the direction of our life even if that changes nothing.
Not to generalize, I am sure some people are more practical and productive to waste time worrying about things outside their control but for the vast majority, I am certain we are all haunted by unease one way or the other. We find ways to compare and contrast through deductive reasoning.
Is there a lesson here?
Yes, this is a subtle reminder to accept life with all the complexities that being alive poses from the joyful moments to the down times. To receive comfort when it comes and learn to abase when it doesn’t, to bask in the good things and endure the difficult. Remember that this too shall pass.
Xoxo,
Dcconnoisseur.
Connoisseur of Memories 