LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

If you remember the popular song on Instagram or tik tok… LEAVE ME ALONE, PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE (repeat).

I resonate with it a lot, but not in the comic sense that it presents in those videos. It is with heavy heart I type this…

I am female and some things happen to me by the mere reason that I am. I walk down the street and get catcalled. I am called beautiful even when I don’t want to be complimented. I may be the victim yet, I am often blamed as the perpetrator.

This is just a friendly reminder.

To all guys even those in offices wearing suit and tie, forming elite and gentlemanly; that say “women exaggerate, it was just a joke”. Please refrain from this foolishness.

There is nothing appealing about being objectified just because one has a vagina. I strongly dislike the fact that most women I know personally and from afar, have been assaulted at one point in time or even just narrowly escape sexual assault, myself included.

PLEASE REFRAIN FROM SEXUAL ASSAULT!!!!

Satisfy your depraved cravings with willing people. Trust me, you will find them! The internet is big enough.

About unnecessary compliments  showered on unwilling women by members of the male specie that think complimenting a woman is doing her a favour and being chivalrous, please keep your “goodwill” compliment!

Not all of us need to satisfy the craving of male validation. I know I am beautiful, thanks for telling me I look good please, leave it at that. My receptiveness is just politeness. Please, do not mistake my genteel and demure manner for interest. I know how to communicate desire.

To all the men that think a woman is always for the taking because it is a “man’s world” spoiler alert; 🙄 that audacity is absolutely flawed. Honestly, it is the audacity for me.😡

I have been assaulted by a compliment before, I know it is hard to believe but it is my story. I was walking down the street of my house heading back to my apartment after just briefly escorting my friend to her uber. Only for some group of guys to start screaming “beautiful” at me. Of course, I panicked, it was a lonely road, I didn’t want to encourage any further conversation or action.

Next thing I know, one of them starts saying is it because I don’t think I am beautiful that’s why I am not responding (I know some of you may be thinking how is this so wrong?). Ordinarily, this would have been a good thing but after years of aggressive complimenting, I am now an expert at decoding when a compliment is a leeway for more.

Or is it the memorable event of having a bike man tell me to my face as I was about to cross a busy road and I repeat for lack of better translation (since it was in Yoruba language), “bring out your breast, let me suck it”.

If you are offended by the lewdness and audacity of this statement, Imagine how gobsmacked I was especially since I do not know this man from Adam, we are not of the same social station, I probably will never meet him again, and I wasn’t even dressed proactively! (Not that it would have mattered in the face of this entitled individual male specie).

It is sad that women can feel legitimate fear just walking on the street or even doing mundane stuff. Just the other day, my friend got slapped because, wait for it; she looked like a “prostitute“.

Politely sirs, men can never be permitted to dictate what a woman should wear especially if I am nothing to you. I am not going to respect your opinion just because you are male if it reeks of stupidity and entitlement.

Honestly, this conversation is not one that can be had enough even if it were scripted. It is one that needs to be a constant reminder on breakfast tables within families, in gatherings among colleagues, work place symposium, the list is endless.

I know this post may seem like an attack on men or that I am a male hater but I will not be abashed for such misconception. I am tired of playing polite politics even when it hurts just because I do not want to seem aggravating or exasperating.

Henceforth, if a man assaults me in any manner whatsoever I WILL SCREAM! irrespective of what it is. Be it inappropriate words, unwanted touch, unsolicited compliments. No more political correctness, label me mad if you must. I have reasons to be furious.

Mind you, for women who also act this way, you are not exempted from this post. Nobody reserves the right to make another feel uncomfortable or unsafe.

I won’t keep silent.

#sorosoke(speak up)